"No" Is A Complete Sentence! | Three Ways To Shift Your Mindset
I bet you didn't know those two little letters could make such a profound statement!
Do you often under-use the word no? Are you hesitant to stand up for YOUR priorities and instead put the needs of others first? I truly believe that is common, and has a lot to do with the fact that we often don't have solid personal power boundaries.
I call it personal power because, energetically, you are giving something away that maybe you don't have to give, especially if you are usually on the bottom of your priority list, or not on it at all, and your cup is empty! There are things you can do to get that power back, so do not fear.
Three Ways To Begin Your Shift
1. Set boundaries for your energy.
Watch out for energy vampires and don't let them dictate where your energy goes. Only you know how much you have to give and where your priorities lie. You also never owe anyone an explanation. "No" is a complete sentence!
2. Know your worth.
Start healing any blocks or negative self-talk you have around your self-worth. It's much easier to say "no" and have it be a complete sentence when you have a strong sense of self-worth. You will no longer feel the need to justify your actions to others because you know your response to their request will not affect your relationship. Those who value your worth will not be judgemental when you set boundaries. That being said, when you have never set boundaries, often you need to re-train people how to treat you because the precedence has been set based on how you have always treated yourself.
3. Set yourself at the top of your priority list.
Your needs need to come first, before you try to look after everyone around you. If you are not making your own priority list, your energy will not be there to give away. You need to invest in yourself, whether that is self-care, personal development, spiritual development or study, or a creative outlet. Be sure to take the time and fill your own cup first. After all, when you are on a plane what do they teach you? Put your own mask on before helping anyone else. You won't be any good to anyone if you are pouring from an empty cup and your mental, physical and emotional health will suffer dearly.
Practice Makes Perfect
As an empath, I am very sensitive to energy and the exchange of it. I am also a people-pleaser in recovery. I don't remember a time, previously in my life, where I could say "no" and have it be a complete sentence. I have always felt like I had to justify myself. Luckily, I started doing those three things mentioned above and, over the course of four years and a LOT of practice later, I can now use the word "no" independently and have it be enough. It definitely takes practice and I have needed accountability to get through some of those mindset shifts, but it was worth every penny I invested to know my energy is now mine to prioritize.